Monday, August 20, 2012

Good News?

Well I went to Church for the Sunday Service yesterday. However, this article has nothing to do with the good news or the word of god.

I have been married for about 16 months now and people who I know frequently ask me a question. Yes, this question is about the Good News. I was not so prepared to answer this question the first few times. Frankly, I did not expect so many relatives to ask me this question. However, now it has got to a point where I felt I should write about my experience so far.

Well for all people who yet do not know what good news means? This means people around you are actually interested in knowing when you intend to become a parent.

I cannot understand why everyone around is so interested in knowing about this. What pleasure do they get in knowing about this? I feel relatives must leave this decision to the married couple alone, as in a way this is invading in their married life. I wonder if this is one way of finding out whether the couple is sexually active. I know that no one would have the guts to ask that question straightforward. Hence, probably they ask this question.

For the start, I did not even know what my uncles, aunties, cousins, and colleagues were trying to ask me:
  •          So when is the family expanding?
  •          Are you hiding anything?
  •          How is your wife’s health doing?

Yes, all of these questions meant only one thing. When do you intend to become a parent? Worst part was recently I was asked a question by a relative who happened to be a bachelor. He asked, “When are you giving the good news?” This question came unexpectedly. His parents did not bother to ask me that. This person is yet to get married. Wondering, what pleasure it would give him in hearing about the good news.

My wife’s and my first family have never asked this question and I respect them for that.  Infact, as I understand, my parents never asked this question to anyone else in the family. Still everyone around considers this as their moral right and ask this question without any shame.

I have replied to this question in my anger a couple of times. Six months into my marriage, one elderly uncle asked me this question. I told him uncle, your son took 5 years to become a parent, give me some consideration atleast. That made him quiet. I guess my response stunned him. I wonder if this happens only in Indian culture, or relatives in all countries subject married couples to this question.

Well, I would not like to share private details with everyone around on when I plan to raise a family. When the time comes and with god’s blessings, everyone will get the good news. I wonder what is there to hide when the times does come.

Well, I have always been a planner. For all who do not know, I jokingly told my friends about 3-4 years back that I would get married on May 7, 2011. Yes, I did that. Well this is the day my parents got married in 1971. I always thought that I would get married when I was 29-30, which I again did. I know you might ask me whether I am serious when I tell you that my wife’s parents also got married on that same date many years back. Well, this was a real co-incidence. That was not in my list J

I wonder if the next time people around me do ask me about the good news, I should just state, 05/10/15. This date is not in my list either. J However, that should make a few people quiet for the time being atleast.

If you are married, did you face this question? How did you handle this situation?